Unfinished Thesis

Oh, yes. I’m part of that group that doesn’t finish their thesis. The only difference I’ve got among these people is that I can’t finish it because I feel completely nervous and anxious of doing it wrong that I can’t seem to do it.

It might seem a little absurd if you think about it this way, but my brain tells me the opposite. I feel like I’m not capable of doing it, like it’s way beyond my knowledge and ability. But I know it’s a lie. I studied for this and it’s a test of what I just learned (well, two years ago, to be specific.)

I am justifying myself for not being able to finish it a couple of years ago because of the depression crisis I had to face back then, when it was in fact diagnosed. But now? Yes, I still have to deal with feeling depressed, but my life can’t dwell on that. I have overcomed it, I have a new fight now everyday; nevertheless I am not in a crisis and I can, because I can, do this. I can finish my thesis.

I guess I had to write it, to put it out there to make it real. Wish me luck and/or pray for me.

Today I am grateful for:

– Newfound strength

– Will power

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